Good morning everybody!
............

Yea, I'm sure there's some sort of thread for this sort of thing over in Chat (what don't we have over there?) but us old farts see enough doctors that we'll relate to this well and Dr. Mike will have a few pointers on things to avoid. You all have read the quotes from insurance claims of course but here's the version from actual medical records as recorded by doctors (sorry, I couldn't resist commenting):

By the time he was admitted, his rapid heart had stopped, and he was feeling better. (And there I had thought no pulse was a bad thing - silly me.)

On the second day the knee was better and on the third day it had completely disappeared. (See! There's no need for knee replacement surgery. Just lose those pesky body parts.)

Between you and me, we ought to be able to get this lady pregnant. (Hmmm, so this is the AMA's answer to the WWE's tag team matches?)

Healthy appearing decrepit 69 year old male, mentally alert but forgetful. (Clearly, the best way to avoid those nasty malpractice issues is to cover all your bases.)

The patient experienced sudden onset of severe shortness of breath with a picture of acute pulmonary edema at home while having sex which gradually deteriorated in the emergency room. (Well, for once they can't blame those awful hospital gowns! And I DON'T want to know how they got to the hospital.)

The patient has been depressed ever since she began seeing me in 1983. (Now THERE's a rousing endorsement.)

When she fainted, her eyes rolled around the room. (Hey, at least they're easier to find than contacts!)

The patient refused an autopsy. (Obviously a recommended course of treatment by their HMO.)

MyOnlineTeam Daily Statistics for 12/21 - Active Members

Active team members report
==========================

                                                     Current          Points
Active member name            Rank      Change       Points        This Period
=========================     =====     ======     ===========     ===========
marysduby                         1          0      40,548,240          39,691
RT                                2          0      26,890,236          71,656
Coingames                         3          0      19,139,931          60,094
parmesian                         4          0      18,707,630          34,556
nl59056                           5          0      15,030,685               0
Dave Bell                         6          0      11,318,868          17,742
Esteban69                         7          0      11,044,639           3,208
keithhenry                        8          0       9,584,457          12,722
Jonathan Figdor                   9          0       7,070,160          36,011
Fanie                            10          0       6,745,064               0
brown chris                      11          0       5,878,532          21,128
frans6nl                         12          0       5,832,615           4,678
PohSoon                          13          0       5,406,777             454
sulcata                          14          0       5,205,439           3,764
NiceMedTexMD                     15          0       5,046,012          23,222
Vuj                              16          0       4,193,260           4,027
Blueprint                        17          0       4,145,286           4,847
Alain Bryden                     18          0       2,581,455               0
Tomwp                            19          0       2,566,505           1,634
lawrencehardin                   20          0       2,327,607             781
wrr                              21          0       1,955,287           2,900
siseberg                         22          0       1,824,142               0
Wunderwuzzi                      23          0       1,698,939             450
Sunny L. Kae                     24          0       1,680,204           2,513
kkelson                          25          0       1,662,798               0
smcclarigan                      26          0       1,654,935               0
txjallen                         27          0       1,417,665           1,601
johng                            28          0       1,359,947             643
Rulkethecharon                   29          0       1,289,117           5,508
harry_i_c                        30          0       1,035,167           5,532
Airwolf_Liu                      31          0         946,410           1,721
darth_vader                      32          0         923,836           3,936
laughing66607                    33          0         912,878             735
Jockin                           34          0         789,624           1,279
elpe                             35          0         738,751               0
imin                             36          0         696,279           1,934
Bon Kuhlman                      37          0         571,157               0
Momentary Lapse of Reason        38          0         333,294               0
barney15c                        39          0         257,025             522
madambaster                      40          0         244,340             690
Natalino                         41          0         237,656             506
cknotty                          42          0         181,573               0
TheRoket                         43          0          94,386           1,415
Daeloan                          44          0          15,678           9,638

Note: Active members are those who earned points in the prior 30 days.

Top Twenty active members returning points today:
01: RT - 71,656 points
02: Coingames - 60,094 points
03: marysduby - 39,691 points
04: Jonathan Figdor - 36,011 points
05: parmesian - 34,556 points
06: NiceMedTexMD - 23,222 points
07: brown chris - 21,128 points
08: Dave Bell - 17,742 points
09: keithhenry - 12,722 points
10: Daeloan - 9,638 points
11: harry_i_c - 5,532 points
12: Rulkethecharon - 5,508 points
13: Blueprint - 4,847 points
14: frans6nl - 4,678 points
15: Vuj - 4,027 points
16: darth_vader - 3,936 points
17: sulcata - 3,764 points
18: Esteban69 - 3,208 points
19: wrr - 2,900 points
20: Sunny L. Kae - 2,513 points

Total points returned today: 381,738
Active members returning points today: 34
Average points per member active today: 11,227.5882

Hope it isn't too late to join the end of year celebration.



http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2534/4206055792_bcb53c7d6c_o.png

Wow.... Now that is a cruncher!! I am impressed.